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Emotional cheating… What is it and how can you spot it?

Do you suspect that your partner is cheating on you? Do you get the feeling that they aren’t being faithful, but can’t seem to find evidence of their affair? It could be that your partner is having an emotional affair.

In a lot of cases, our private investigators find evidence of physical infidelity during our investigations. However, sometimes the affair is not a physical one, but an emotional one. These are harder to investigate, and harder to understand, but it’s still cheating. An emotional affair can be just as bad, if not worse, than a physical affair, as it’s a sign that your partner has emotionally checked out of the relationship.

How is an emotional affair different from just a close friendship? If your partner is emotionally cheating on you, it means that their feelings for another person are now romantic. They go on dates, they are very open with each other, and have high levels of personal intimacy and attachment. An emotional affair may start out as a close friendship, and slowly become more romantic. In a typical affair, your partner may go to the other person to fulfill their sexual needs. In an emotional affair, they would go to that person to fulfill their emotional needs, such as when they are feeling vulnerable.

Signs to watch out for include the following:

  • Spending an unusual amount of time alone with the same friend
  • Sudden secretiveness
  • Lying about who they’re with
  • Disengaging from the relationship (i.e. not caring anymore)
  • They defend their time with the other person by saying ‘we’re just friends’

So what can you do? It may seem like the worst situation, but it’s not necessarily over. Sometimes people can’t help what they feel, but by not acting on their urges it can indicate that they’re still committed to the relationship they have with you. If you can bring up the situation with them and explain that it’s inappropriate and hurting your relationship, that may be enough to get them to stop. However you need to know for sure whether it’s just a friendship or something deeper. If you can get evidence of intimacy, even if it’s not sexual, such as holding hands, lying on each other’s laps or deep embraces, that gives you enough to go to your partner with more conviction. Through some discreet surveillance, a private investigator can help get evidence of these moments and give you the knowledge you need to address the situation.

If you have suspicions about your partner cheating, emotionally or otherwise, our detectives can help you get the proof you need to stop living in doubt. If you’d like to investigate your suspicions, please call us today to speak with one of our discreet detectives. We have the highest degree of experience and skill to find out what’s really going on. You deserve to know the truth! Give us a call on 1300 721 715 or email info@eliteinvestigations.com.au to see how we might be able to put your mind at ease.